The Messed Up ‘Cookie-Cutter’ Life

‘Never in a millon years did I think I’d be the one. I never thought I’d fit into the role of a minister. Maybe someone else, maybe someone more qualified, but certainly not me!’

Those were my initial sentiments when I was called into the eldership role at my local church.

As feelings of ‘not qualified and not good enough’ began to roam my mind; I realized, indeed I had a problem on my hands...

I mean, why not me?

For as long as I could remember, the Man Upstairs and I have always had a relationship. Sure we’ve gone through seasons where I’ve been distant, but I can’t remember a day in my life where I’ve ever doubted His existence.

Going back, I could remember being very young having bold conversations with the Lord. The awareness of His omnipresence was evident to me; it was as if I knew He was right there next to me in the room. 

Growing up in a Christian home helped instill these values, ones that never seemed to have left me. Simple things like, “read your Bible and pray every day so you will grow, grow, grow...” was a song that rang in my heart. Even today, it dictates my daily practices.

And can I tell you how many books on prayer, how to study the bible, how to become a woman after God's own heart, concordances or other biblical resources I have coming out of my ears; all because they happen to be of interest to me. I have so many books, my poor library can barely contain them all!

I have this burning desire to grow- to ever become a better person, the best I can be! And this same message I desire others to have. 

I know it may not be what a conventional person may want, let alone pursue, but it is my deepest desire. It truly is.

Now, inspite of how spiritually perfect this blog post is beginning to make me sound; don't get it twisted, I was not at the least bit perfect. Nope, not at all! 

Actually, I've always been and remain quite far from it.

I have made so many terrible mistakes in my teens and early adulthood that I couldn't even begin to tell you how much the Lord has worked on me...and continues to work on me!

Point of the matter is, we are all living proof of God's grace and how necessary His grace is for our call. 

Most of us, if not all of us, fail to live the perfectly cookie cutter life. We just can't, we're humans! But that does not in the least bit disqualify us from being called or from walking out the call God’s placed on our lives. 

Sometimes we forget that God calls us, even before we recognize the call within ourselves. The Bible says, before we knew Him, He knew us and intricately mapped out our lives (Psalms 139). The call was placed on our lives before we knew Christ. And according to Romans 8, He called us knowing that He’d need to justify our wrong doings and all of our inadequacies so that we could be counted in, not out. In justifying us, God is glorified through us! 

So here we are. We’re all ministers! You don’t need a piece of paper or title to qualify you. Certainly these help the congregation or others around you to recognize what you already know in and of yourself. But really, God’s already qualified you with an irrefutable calling!  

Therefore, I don’t have to be perfect, nor do you! We need to recognize the grace of God on our lives and live just that- live in the consciousness of His grace by way of His call. In doing this, others will see Christ and be drawn to Him. 

Plainly put, that’s our role as ministers. 

So again, why not me? More importantly, why not you?