So, What's Important to You Anyway?

Some days, I just feel like the worst aunt ever!

I could be doing so much more with my nieces and nephew...but I don't.

And I know what you're thinking, but you're wrong.

It's not because I don't love them. Nope. It's certainly not because I don't want to celebrate them either. It's simply because I am not intentional with my time towards them.

It's so disappointing. Believe me when I say, I am hanging my head down right now.

My number one excuse is always "I'm just so busy...I gotta do this and I gotta do that..."


Blah, blah, blah...excuse, excuse, excuse.

I always seem to have an excuse for everything except for the things I choose to prioritize.

Busy doing what Monique? Busy doing things that are my priority?


What could be more important then spending time with the people I love? What could be more important than mentoring the children, the younger women in my life?

It's a sad reality, but it's my truth. And it's one that I am terribly ashamed of.

When I think about it, I throw money at them on their birthdays, for Christmas and any other special holiday; like they're some kind of charity case! When I see them (once in a blue moon), I squeeze them and kiss them to pieces, as if they were once lost and now found.

I feel horrible...

I mean well, I promise! Still, I wonder how my intentions are being received? Although intent is not my problem- I've got great intentions! But I need to know, how are my loved ones receiving my heart? Can they even see my heart in what I give?

I ask these questions because we often skip this step and just keep doing what we've always done. And if you're anything like me, guilt sets in and I begin to self loath, hoping to make myself feel better.

Perhaps you have a parent or elderly loved one with whom you wish you could spend more time. Or, maybe you're involved in a relationship that requires some conscious effort on your part to help it evolve into what you're hoping it becomes.

We have to ask ourselves, are our intentions reflected in our actions? Are our actions replicated in the way they are intended?

As I sit here writing this blog post, I recognize that being busy just doesn't cut it. It's not an excuse worthy of any recognition. As a matter of fact, it's a scapegoat for our lack of intention.

What if in our time of need, God was just too busy to lend us His helping hand? What if His back was turned away from us when we were in crisis? And what if His ears were deaf to our painful heart cries?

I only pose these questions to help us realize how much God prioritizes you and I. Have you ever thought about that?

Our relationship with God is such a priority to Him that He sent His one and only Son as a resolution for us to come back into relationship with Him.

When Adam sinned, it separated us from God. But instead of us, the ones at fault, finding a solution, Christ became the resolution for us all!

You see, unlike us, God is never too occupied to hear us out or to lend a helping hand. After all, He is love! He is patient and He is kind. And He goes out of His way to please others; epitomizing selfless love!

Would my nieces and nephew prefer more quality time with me? Of course they would. Could I do more to foster a better relationship with them? Absolutely! So, if this is their need, then I have an obligation to love them in the way that they need. Remember, when we know better, we should do better.

Let's prioritize the important relationships in our lives!



1. Choose What's Important to You

Yes, it's YOUR choice! You decide what order God, your family and friends rank. You decide who and what is going to be given most importance in your life.

2. Focus on their Felt Need

What do the people in your life need most? Attention? Acceptance? Forgiveness? Quality time? You know them best. If you are even slightly doubtful, simply ask. Seeking to meet the relational needs of others is the beginning of prioritizing the relationships in your life.

3. Give

Give what you must to meet their felt need. Give out of a willing heart, not grudgingly or half heatedly. But give wholly and completely.

To prioritize the relationships in your life is to regard the people you love as important. Believe it or not, it attributes value. And it demonstrates love.

Love the people around you!


1 Corinthians 13:3-10 MSG

" … no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love. Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut, Doesn't have a swelled head, Doesn't force itself on others, Isn't always "me first," Doesn't fly off the handle, Doesn't keep score of the sins of others, Doesn't revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, Puts up with anything, Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, But keeps going to the end. Love never dies…"


Speak God's Word over your Life

A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity. (Proverbs 17:17)

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another... (Hebrews 10:24-25)

Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. (Ephesians 4:2-3)